Home

I've been thinking on the topic of "home" for the past few weeks in a way I've never done so before. From the moment we found out that Will was on his way, Marty and I have been talking about where to raise him and our other (future) children. We've talked about family, church, schools, communities, geography, politics, safety, you name it -- anything and everything that influences how you function inside and outside the four walls and a roof you call your home. The most obvious place to call home was, of course, Indianapolis; my family lives there and the only other option would be Mississippi, and Marty has stated vehemently more than once that he'll "never live in the swamp again." So, even before my first trimester was over, we fixed our trajectory on Indiana and never wavered. In fact, I felt true grief that circumstances wouldn't allow for me to deliver Will in Indiana, surrounded by family and friends and just...familiarity.

Well, to make a very long story very short, things have changed. Without going into great detail, my parents came down for an unexpected visit a few weeks ago, sat down in our living room, and gently suggested we perhaps not move back to Indiana. The reason why? Because in a couple of years, they won't be there. Neither will my sister Sarah and Garrett and their brood. Where will they be? It feels funny to say, but they're moving even further south than where we currently reside -- North Carolina! There are many, many, many reasons for this move, but the primary one is my nephew Ethan. North Carolina offers him the best chance for a mainstream education, the best therapy for his autism (they utilize something called the "TEACH method"), the best opportunity to learn and grow and achieve his full potential. He's simply not getting any kind of decent opportunity from Indiana's special education track, and the curriculum only promises to get worse, and downright awful by the time he's in 3rd grade. And because my parents are nearing retirement, and because they refuse to live without their grandchildren (by their own admission, so cute), they're seeking a big change and thus, the big move south.

Without missing a beat, without so much as a moment's worth of hesitation, we happily decided to make North Carolina our new destination as well. In fact, our compass spun so quickly I got a bit of whiplash -- and I suddenly had the clearest perspective I've ever had when it comes to "home." All this time, I've been keening like crazy to call myself a Hoosier again, and suddenly I realized, I don't even care about that so much, I just care about living near my family. But even that is secondary. In all of the conversations that ensued, I further realized that I just want to be with my Marty and our Will. I want us to have a family adventure all our own. In all the planning and plotting to provide Will the best growing-up situation and as a result, setting our sights on Indy, I never sat and actually had this thought -- and shame on me!!! Of course, I'd be lying if I said I don't want to be near my family -- I absolutely do and Marty shares that desire. So, in a couple of years, we'll pick up stakes and mosey on down the trail. But in the meantime...oh, in the meantime, we've decided to choose the best place for us to be right now.

And not only have we found a great place, I've also stumbled upon the greatest sense of contentment I've ever had. A scant 2 and half years ago, I was perhaps the most miserable person I knew. I was in a sham of a marriage, unable to have children, lonely at home and sad at work and depressed everywhere in between. I fixed a fake smile on my face for the world to see but cried constantly on the inside, knowing in my deepest soul that my life was nothing that I wanted it to be. And now here I am, those 2 and a half years later, married to the love of my life (just know that I type that with tears in my eyes, because this man is genuinely a prince among men), listening to my baby son coo in the other room, and looking at the pictures I'm about to show you. I'm just so happy, because I've found my true home, my family with Marty, and together we've found a physical home, those four walls and a roof that will shelter and protect and embrace us for this next chapter in our lives.

And so, without further ado, meet my loft in downtown Kingsport:

7-foot French doors that are our front windows (follow me, I'm going to slowly spin to the right around the great room)

The windows now closed so you can see the restored hardwood floors and the exposed brick wall


The area that will be our dining room


Kids, meet the kitchen of my dreams: stainless steel appliances, extra-tall espresso-stained cherry cabinets, custom concrete countertops, and the coolest pendant lights you'll ever hope to see hanging above your sink


Another view of the kitchen, and if you look up, you can see the exposed wooden beams/rafters


The view down the hallway (doors lead to master suite, Will's nursery, guest bathroom, and laundry closet)


The area that will be my office (excuse the presence of the leasing agent, who may be my newest friend; her name's Samantha, she's lived in Europe, she had a private Christian school upbringing [I kid you not], and she's already invited us into her loft [she lives here too] and she might just be the coolest chick ever)

Finally, the living area, with those majestic windows open again (we have 2 sets of 2).

So why did y'all go for a loft?, you might ask. Well, we tried to get a house. Tried several times to find a decent home to rent, but OH. MY. STARS. I've realized something. There are a lot of people in the world who don't live clean, sanitary lives. To put it simply, there are just a lot of GROSS people out there, and I'll be darned if I'm going to rent a house from someone whose basement smells like dirty animals. In our quest to find some new digs, I haunted Craig's List and we went on several jaunts to see places, and we (read, I) kept getting more and more frustrated. It wasn't just once that we drove away from a place with me in shock and/or tears! Then one night, we saw the ad for these brand-new lofts, converted from an old furniture warehouse. By the time we called, there was only ONE left. Marty went and toured that same day, and we signed our lease on Friday, the same day I got to see it for the first time. With absolutely no sense of propriety, I got to the great room and started jumping up and down in sheer joy. My greatest feeling isn't joy, however -- it's gratitude. I'm overwhelmed with gratitude. Thank you, Lord, for bringing me home.

And thank goodness my blog is private, because I can share with y'all our new address (we move in December 1st):

The Conways

217 Broad Street, Loft 206

Kingsport, TN 37660

Now, one last and completely unrelated photo. This is Will with his beloved Dr. Terry, his pediatrician. I'm not kidding when I say that they love each other. I think the photo says it all.

Quick and random

• Thank you to everyone for the sweet and encouraging comments on "doing it all." I feel lifted up by those of you who have journeyed this path of motherhood before me, and I feel refreshed by the perspective of those who are on a different path altogether. Thank God we're not all on the same path at the same time, or chaos and panic would reign, eh? I do believe this is why God intended a sisterhood of women, for this very encouragement and refreshment that I've felt from you all. Thanks again, my lovelies! I'm going to write a few follow-up posts as I continue to juggle my responsibilities and improve(?) in my efforts. Of course, I'm sitting here in my pj's and a bathrobe at nearly 5 p.m., but at least the kitchen is clean and dinner is planned for the evening. Baby steps!!!
• I just saw a picture on a blog of a mama kitty nursing several baby kittens. I'm not a cat person, but this picture brought tears to my eyes. Nursing is such a gift (for all us mammals!), and I have been so thankful for the opportunity to nurse my son. We supplement with formula so Daddy can take a feeding and so Will's tummy can get full (more on that coming in his 3-month post), but I intend to keep breastfeeding for another few months at least, not just for the health benefits for me and for William, but also because it's such a unique and beautiful way to bond with another human being. Will takes bottles with gusto, but he always wears a different expression when I'm breastfeeding him, and I will be truly sad when I wean him and I'll no longer see the look of absolute peace and contentment on his face when we're cuddled up in the glider and he's nursing. Sometimes I'm overwhelmed by the beauty of it, because it's one of those things I really gave up on ever getting the chance to experience. God is so good!
• Snickers ice cream bars may very well be my Favorite. Food. Ever.
• Who else is totally geeked about THIS tonight???

A shout-out

I just couldn't resist giving a shout-out to my dearest Kate's husband, Dan DeVries...last night he won the election for MAYOR of his hometown!!! Dan is now the mayor, or more accurately, the village president, of the Village of Schoolcraft, Michigan.

All I could think when I heard the news was, are we really grown-up now? Dan is MY AGE!

Anyhoo -- a big fat congratulations to you, Dan, and also to the First Lady of Schoolcraft, my BF Kate!!! Reign with grace and dignity, my dearest! :)

Please go here and here to read more!

Random thoughts

Well, maybe "thoughts" is going too far. I don't do much thinking these days, what with the 4-5 hours of very interrupted sleep I get per night. Thank God for Marty, who lets me catch up on weekends and the occasional weeknight. I've always been a champion sleeper, and now my little Champion is not a sleeper -- either there's an irony there or I'm so tired I think there's an irony there. :)

Anyway, here's the random stuff floating in my head:

• I'm so flipping STOKED for the new season of Project Runway to premiere this Thursday. Who knew that Lifetime, of all networks, would save one of the best shows ever from cancellation? Lifetime: Television for Women -- and Cool People!

Of course I have to mention again that when we were in New York in November, we walked right past THE building and I was so tempted to go in and find me some Tim Gunn!

• I am enjoying my new favorite fragrance -- "Beachy" from Lilly Pulitzer. We picked this up when we were in Indiana -- Marty and Will and I had a fabulous time shopping at Von Maur (Daddy let Mama get some fun treats!) And I have to confess I didn't even know about Lilly Pulitzer until I moved to the South. If you don't know who and what I'm talking about, go here and here to read!
• Right now I have a baby sleeping on my chest, yet I'm typing. How is this magic achieved, you ask? With the help of my new favorite possession, a Baby Bjorn!

p.s. -- did they purposely get an Angelina Jolie lookalike for this ad? Is she the face of modern motherhood, I wonder?

• Since the thought of reading anything of substance only makes me more tired, I'm delving into the lighter reading/chick-lit section of the stack of books I bought to read while on maternity leave (what was I thinking?). I'm currently reading this and, of course, shamelessly loving it.
• Finally, my friend Kristen called me this morning to tell me she's expecting a baby GIRL. This is quite the news, as she's had a "decade of boy" now (she has two sons) and didn't dare hope for a girl. But the ultrasound this morning revealed a dream come true! I have to say, I can't wait to have a girl. Okay, yes I can wait. For awhile. Until the stretch marks from my pregnancy with Will fade a tad, at least! But I would L-O-V-E to have a daughter, and I'm so excited that Kristen is getting her baby girl. She's getting a chandelier for her nursery! How chic is that? Congrats again, my Kristen!

Catching up: business trip, baby shower, birthing classes, and body language

Yep, that's a hefty blog post title, but I have much to cover. It seems so odd that I haven't updated my blog in over 2 weeks, but I think I may have set records for being busy (at least for pregnant girls) in these last 2 weeks!

Business trip: first off, I should mention that we went to our first childbirth class the (Monday) night before I left for my trip, but more on that later. Let's just say for now, though, that it gave me quite a bit of food for thought for my 7-hour drive to Indianapolis! Anyway, I departed on Tuesday morning in my rental car (a PT Cruiser!) after giving my Marty a few lingering kisses goodbye -- it was pretty awful leaving him and the safety I feel with him, especially in these last few weeks of pregnancy. However, I was armed with copies of my prenatal records, just in case something were to happen while I was away from my doctors and hospital (and husband!). The 7-hour trip was pretty brutal, both on my concentration (I get very sleepy in the afternoons) and on my bladder! But I finally made it to the Omni downtown Indy, where I'd be staying the next couple nights, and then met up with my coworkers Caron and Teri. The 3 of us function as a vendor editorial team for a few writing teams at _____ (big pharma company in Indy; for some reason I'm loath to use the actual name here -- privacy concerns and all that?). Anyway, we went to Spaghetti Factory and had the greatest time with each other; it's so funny because we "talk" on email every day but have only physically met twice! I also met my boss for the first time in the Omni lobby that night -- who else can say that after reporting to your boss for nearly a year??? Work-from-home is a crazy thing sometimes! The next day was a series of meeting people and sitting in meetings. That day we did a lot of walking around to different meeting rooms, and by the afternoon, I was coming down a staircase when I suddenly had a series of Braxton-Hicks contractions. I didn't tell anyone right away, just wanting to stay on my feet until we reached our destination. This was only my second experience with Braxton-Hicks, and for some reason, I always break out into a sweat when I feel them, because they come on with swift intensity and are pretty strong and border on painful. They ended as soon as I had been sitting down for a few minutes, which my doctor told me was normal (too much activity can bring them on, and therefore, ceasing the activity can stop them completely). Fortunately, the next day we pretty much stayed in the same room all day, so the only activity I had were my frequent trips to the restroom. I know people understand that pregnant women need to run to the potty quite a bit, but I'm sorry, it's still embarrassing to have people observe how many times you've exited the room in an hour's time!!! All-in-all, it was a great business trip, especially because I finally got to put so many faces to the names I see in my inbox every day (yeah, I'm particularly talking about you, Laura!). Thursday afternoon I dropped a couple of coworkers off at the new Indy airport (so stunning, so chic! Good job, Indianapolis!) and made my way to Greenwood, aka, "home." I got to see my parents, sister Sarah, and my nieces and nephews -- it had been a couple months since our last visit, and everyone was pretty astonished at the size of my belly. I joked that I had a soccer ball up my shirt but my 2-year-old nephew Elijah didn't get it and kept wanting up my shirt to retrieve that soccer ball! So stinkin' cute. Then I showed him my skin and told him it was a baby, and he patted my belly and said "baby" but seemed pretty disappointed that it was a baby and not a soccer ball. Oh the priorities of a 2-year-old boy. :) That night and Friday were spent in various activities with my family -- my mom took me baby-gear shopping on Friday afternoon, then Sarah and Garrett took me out to dinner and to see the new Star Trek movie on Friday night. I had the greatest time, but kept wanting my hubby to be with me!!! Saturday morning I met Ellen for our tradition of Starbucks + manis/pedis, and I had the greatest time there, too. The Asian folks who run the place know us (that tells you how often El and I frequent the joint!) and hugged me upon seeing the prodigal return for a visit from Tennessee! Then it was home to take a quick shower, receive some Mother's Day tulips at the door from my Marty (oh yes, he is absolutely the perfect husband), and then I was off to my baby shower!

Baby shower:

The mama with that soccer ball up her dress! (Me and Will at exactly 31 weeks.)

The beautiful cake with baby booties (I think one of my little nieces went in for a finger sample at the front...).

The bountiful spread: my mom's famous chicken salad on croissants and bakery buns, spinach dip with Hawaiian bread, veggies and dip, cheeseball with crackers and chips, garden salad, fruit salad, pasta salad, and pineapple punch!

The bountiful goodies...I was honestly overwhelmed with the love and generosity shown to me, Marty, and our little son. The gift bags covered several feet in diameter on my sister's kitchen floor, and it just left me gaping with awe and gratitude.

Some of my guests -- so much love in the room. And the impromptu entertainment was provided by my nieces Ada and Abby, who performed a princess dance in their little pink dresses and toy wands. (Once again, I pray to the Father to give me a little girl, too!)

Me and Ellen, who did all the note-taking for me (it was a serious job!).

Opening gifts...

I love the little man-robes!

Exhausted but so happy to have finally experienced this lovely rite of passage that I had looked forward to -- quite literally -- all my life.

Thank you so much to everyone who attended and/or sent a gift. Marty was stunned to see all the bags piled up in our living room, and we are just beyond grateful for all the love you've shown to us. Thank you for outfitting our little boy and his nursery in such style! And for giving me a dream come true (a very special thank-you to my sisters for this). If it had been up to me, I would have experienced all this many years ago, but God's timing is perfect, and I am walking proof of that. Thank you God for all the blessings, given in the best way and at the right time!

Birthing class: (isn't this post over yet??? you are wondering...) So Marty and I went to our second birthing class just a couple nights ago, and it was even more sobering than the first one. Now, our teacher (a labor/delivery nurse for over 20 years), Cindy, is a lovely woman, but she tells it like it is. She doesn't avoid nonsociable words and she really doesn't avoid any topics, no matter how sensitive or private they feel. We are learning quite a bit, and while some of it is fascinating and exciting, other parts are downright scary. I might need a blood transfusion after birth? Eh? I might have to push for 3 hours only to be given a C-section? Double-eh? THAT's what 10 centimeters looks like? Oh glory be! Cindy is not only giving us a birthing education, she's also teaching us breathing techniques (I swear I started to fall asleep during the exercise on Monday -- envisioning a beach while breathing slowly) and explaining all the options we have for labor and delivery. Surprisingly (to me), she has also recommended writing a birth plan. I have heard that presenting a birth plan can be something of an affront to the nursing staff caring for you, and I've no desire to set those important people at odds with me from the moment of "go." However, Cindy has stipulated that we not follow any Internet templates, nor write something 20 pages long. She says to just keep it simple and only include what you feel strongly about. Easy enough, I think: we know that we'd rather have the doctor cut the cord, that Marty and I want to be by ourselves (no guests) during the actual birth, that we want Will kept with us for an hour or so after birth so I can nurse him and we can bond as a family, etc., etc. I also know that I want an epidural if and when I get to that point (I'd like to see how far I can go but I'm not stubbornly holding out for an "au naturel" birth because I'm intimately familiar with my pain threshold). There are probably about 20-25 stipulations we would like to see enforced, but they will certainly fit on 1 piece of paper and (hopefully) wouldn't overwhelm my nurse(s), nor make them feel like they're limited/hampered in doing their job(s).

Body language: Finally, this past week has been something of a change for me in pregnancy symptoms. Maybe it's exacerbated by all the traveling and busy-ness and stress, but I've begun to experience swelling in my hands, feet, and ankles. Every morning I wake up with numb, tingly hands, and it usually takes a couple hours for me to be able to move my wedding ring on my finger. Socks leave angry red impressions on my ankles, and I've taken to only wearing flip-flops (unless it's raining, which really frustrates me!). In addition, I feel this weird pressurized feeling on my chest (especially there), down my arms, and down my thighs. It so freaked me out the other night that I paged my doctor about it (I have to defend myself here; I've made it to nearly 32 weeks without ever having paged the doctor, so I think that's pretty good!). Dr. Pickler reassured me that at this stage of pregnancy, my diaphragm has moved up and there is extra pressure on my chest cavity, and even though it doesn't feel like I'm getting enough oxygen, as long as I can carry on a conversation, that indicates I'm getting plenty of air. She said the pressure I feel in and on my limbs is also perfectly normal. Even though it didn't make me feel much better (I wasn't given any advice on how to alleviate any of the above!), at least I knew I wasn't starting down the road to Scaryville things like toxemia (I had this thought in my head for some reason). It's pretty daunting to think I have 8 weeks to go, and how much worse these things will feel, and how much bigger I'll get(!), but then again, it's only another 8 weeks and then we'll experience the long-awaited arrival of our little man. I can't wait!!!

Whew! End of post, thank goodness. Thanks to my sister Katie for the shower pictures!

a shortie

I just want to share that my little boy is currently kicking me so hard, he's hitting nerves in my belly and making me jump. And his mama doesn't mind one bit -- although my startle reflex is getting frazzled! I just crack up at this little man with his bursts of energy and enthusiasm, and it makes it so much harder to wait to meet him! I love you, William!!!

Baby Indiana Jones and a good weekend

Whew. That's how I feel right now, like it's time to breathe a deep sigh of relief after days and days of busy-ness and lots of emotions. Mid-week last week, I started dealing with raging insomnia that was further plagued by serious bouts of anxiety, all focused in on the baby and our upcoming move to Indy (and the need for a job for Marty there first!). Let's just say that my nesting instinct came on full-force, and because we desperately hope not to be here in Tennessee when William comes, there's no place set aside here as a nursery for him, and for some reason, this drives me bonkers. I mean, up at 2 a.m. kind-of bonkers! All the worries about getting a job in time and moving were exacerbated by a couple days straight of William not moving very much. I don't know about other pregnant mamas, but my baby's movements are my reassurance that everything's going okay with him, so you can imagine how I feel when those movements become scarce! Anyway, after the second night of holding his inconsolable, weeping wife in the pre-dawn hours, my husband very geniusly suggested that he take me home to Indy for the weekend. And I immediately felt better! That's how in-my-own-head I was last week -- I couldn't even think of a solution like visiting home. I needed someone to think of it for me! So, Friday afternoon, we were off to Indy and despite the 7-hour drive, I was quite energetic upon arrival. My mom and dad and Marty and I, plus my Aunt Janice who happened to be staying over, talked until almost 1 in the morning over pieces of blueberry pie. What a huge change from my recent experiences at that time of the morning!!!

And that began just the loveliest weekend. I got to cuddle with my nieces and nephews and make new memories with them, like my little bruiser Elijah playing dinosaurs with me, but insisting "they not scary" although he made roaring noises over and over. So-FLIPPIN'-cute. And Abby demanding to know where her cousin was, and then lifting up my t-shirt so she could try to peer into my belly to see him! We also got to spend time with Ellen and Katie and Chris, and then we went to Katie and Chris' church on Sunday morning, where I saw lots of old and dear friends (I think Kristen and I were seconds away from bawling upon seeing each other!). The best part was Pastor Josh's sermon, though, which was exactly what I needed. He was preaching from Galatians 5 and talking about the works of the flesh, and when he got to idolatry, he explained that the sin of idolatry is obsessing over anything that we put above God, and loving anything that we put above our love for God and His perfect will for our lives. And man-oh-man, was I ever convicted on that point. I told Marty on the way home, I have been so guilty of wanting my perfect little life (loving husband, healthy baby boy, beautiful home, etc.) above wanting whatever God has intended for me. And that it's so easy to start loving the gifts so much that you forget to love the GIVER of those gifts! And I think it's that very sin of idolatry that has kept me up at nights, because in the end, I know I can't force my will on life and I can't control the outcomes of this pregnancy and William's birth, and that by loving God's will, I can be at peace no matter what happens. VERY hard lesson to learn, especially for one who has always longed for a loving husband and the blessing of a child!

So, I came home relaxed and feeling better about things. Of course, then I had to work until I fried my brain yesterday to finish a project, but today things are smooth-sailing and I'm just so thankful for all my gifts in life. Indeed, the minute I stopped worrying about William so much, he turned into my Indiana Jones baby! I told Marty that yesterday he was moving around so much, it actually felt like he was spelunking his little cave-womb and mapping it out, trying to find the exit (which won't appear until July, young man!). I could just imagine my little explorer wearing an Indiana Jones hat while he curiously felt around his environment. He was moving so much in so many new ways, it was cracking me up! He has also started to respond to specific stimuli, namely his daddy's voice and laughter, songs with a discernible beat to them, and even sermons (he kicks me every time I'm sitting in church!). He also responds to mealtime, especially dinner. So far, I think I have a sociable, musical, theological kid who loves good food, which in all truth, is a carbon copy of his daddy!!! I just love it.

Floating on gratitude today!

Halfway Day and the February list

Tomorrow is my official Halfway Day. It should be a recognized holiday in the life of every pregnant woman! I'm so excited to be officially 20 weeks, but I can't help but feel overwhelmed by the remaining 50% of this pregnancy. It seems like AGES ago that we found out we are pregnant -- it was November 6th and we were still trying to grasp that Obama was the new president. Needless to say, the baby news took the edge off that particular disappointment! (No offense to my Democrat friends; you know I love you! But doesn't the stimulus package worry you just a wee bit...?) Anyway, I would love advice on how to stay focused on the finish line and not get bogged down by the ticking of the clock. Mamas out there...how did you do it? Does getting busy planning the nursery and going to baby showers help? Or did you find distraction in other things? Or does the time just finally and eventually pass, like waiting for Christmas? I find that it's almost too difficult to imagine William's birth, or those first precious days as Marty and I and Will become a family, or the moment when my mom gets to hold him, or the looks in my sister's eyes (who are so geeked-excited for me), or when I introduce Will to my niece Abby (who asked her mama, "what's a cousin?")...all of these images make me so antsy I practically dance mentally, and not in a good way!

So, on to bloggy business, my monthly "List":

• What I'm reading: Eclipse, the third in the Twilight series by Stephenie Meyer. I've simply consumed these books, and will need to pick up the fourth this weekend, since I only have a few pages left. Someone tell me what to read after I'm finished!
• What we're spending on: Nada. We're in full-tilt savings mode. Not only do we have a big move coming up with all the associated expenses, we also have some new furniture we're planning on purchasing, plus all the untold numbers of baby items we'll need to buy.
• What we're saving for: See above.
• What I need to do: Pray heartily for a good job opportunity/offer for Marty in Indiana. Walk more and work those muscles I'll need in July! Get my bill-paying system set up more efficiently (I'm basically trying to achieve a "click-and-go" system through our banks so I can still take care of finances when in new baby overload).
• What I'm thinking about: Understanding my parents more. I guess you could say I was somewhat overprotected as a child, but now that I have little William inside me, holy cow, do I ever understand their decisions better. We're already talking about a private Christian academy in Greenwood where we'd like to send Will, at least for kindergarten and elementary school. There's just so much politically correct societal propaganda in public school education, and we want to raise our child our own way and teach him about certain things in life when we think he's mature enough for it.
• What I'm working on: This weekend is it. It's time. I'm going to tackle, once and for all, the EVIL STORAGE ROOM*.
• What I'm happy about: My life. Even though I'm antsy for the future, I've never been so content in my present. God has truly, deeply, and abundantly blessed me.

*once upon a time, this girl got married and started a life with her new husband accompanied only by a few clothes and personal belongings. After a couple months, the newlyweds rented a truck and loaded up a garage-full of this girl's 30 years of accumulated possessions and drove it to their home in Tennessee. They unloaded about 3 million boxes and about half of them were stowed in the couple's basement storage room. This girl wanted to take a break from all the shuffling about of things, so she waited a few weeks to get started on this massive project. And she waited too long. This girl got pregnant and immediately entered a period of illness and fatigue that prevented even the most basic tasks from getting accomplished. Then the holidays came and went...and suddenly it's been a few months and there those darn boxes sit, taunting her. And she's tired of being taunted. So she's going in. Her husband is going to attach a rope to her (burgeoning) belly so she is not lost in the madness. You might want to say prayers.

William's nursery

I know it probably seems a bit premature to be planning these things, especially considering that I have 5 months to go (I can barely tolerate that thought), but now that I know who my little William is (the love grows exponentially when the baby finally has an identity!!!), I can't wait to get started on collecting all the things he'll need in his babyhood!

We couldn't resist. We registered at Target the other night. We searched the Internet for a couple hours on Monday, figuring out what our mutual taste would be for our son's room decor (we are both opinionated people, so it took us a couple hours!). We finally decided on this jungle animals theme. Note: I'm not the most theme-y girl in the world decor-wise, but I loved the smiling faces on these animals and could just imagine making a little lion roar playfully at Will and getting him to giggle...needless to say, after that image, I was sold! We're still debating whether to paint the walls a sunny yellow or a leafy jungle green color...although I think we're leaning toward sunny yellow. Marty loves the khaki and chocolate brown colors especially, while I love the fun oranges and yellows and the accents of blue and green. It's masculine without being in-your-face BLUE!

So anyway, we registered for this set called Tiddliwinks Jungle Friends. It's so cute and affordable, and as I'm told by knowing friends, it better be affordable because it would make me ill to subject expensive bedding to the repeated washings I'm told I'll have to do, especially with a wee boy! It was incredible fun to watch my husband coo (forgive me, honey) over baby socks. He even stole the scanner for a bit to zap some items of his choosing, including a pair of high-top infant tennishoes with lions embroidered on them.

I do need help on something, though...aforementioned knowing friends have told me not to use the quilt that comes with the set for actually bedding down the baby in his crib, but to use it for tummy time or decoration purposes. I'm thinking I'd like to do the latter, but I need to find one of those quilt hangers, and more specifically, one that's designed for the size of a baby quilt. Does anyone know where I can find such a thing? I would also welcome any other suggestions on how to accent William's nursery without buying every little item in the crib set (for example, I don't need the hamper in the set, nor the wall hangings necessarily). I'd like to do something decorative with William's name or monogram, and maybe also something literary (Jungle Book?). Like I said, I'd love suggestions!

Announcing...

Hello everyone!

My mommy and daddy are ecstatic to announce that I'm a BOY!!!

Yes, I sure fooled my mommy. She was so shocked to hear the news and see the visual proof that she told Daddy, "the universe just shifted!" She was really expecting me to be a girl, but Mommy has already told me a dozen times today that she's so proud of her little man and couldn't be happier about my coming arrival into the world. (By the way, Mommy has a picture of the proof but can't seem to bring herself to post pictures of my privates on the Internet, so y'all will just have to believe us!)

Just wanted to let you all know what keeps me busy during the day. Yes, I've begun kicking my mommy in earnest now and sometimes she even feels me do my barrel-rolls!

I also like to suck my thumb...

...and ponder on the meaning of life...

...when I'm not practicing my football kick!

Oh, silly me! I forgot to introduce myself! My name is...

~William Champion Conway~

Mommy and Daddy are going to call me "Will" when Daddy is not calling me "Champ." William is one of mommy's favorite names of all time -- very British, she says -- and Champion is my great-grandma's maiden name. My daddy dearly loved his Grandma Lucic and wants to honor her in this way.

One other thing; my daddy took this picture of my mommy this morning before they went to the doctor's office and I rocked their world! See how big I'm getting in there?

As soon as Mommy is off work today, she and Daddy are going to go shopping for me. They've waited this long and Mommy says she just can't wait anymore!

p.s. My Mommy profusely apologizes for referring to me as "she" before now. She'll amend this.

On behalf of Cupid...

In the 21st century, Cupid has decided to rely on more efficient means of matching lovers...

I don't know if I have any readers who are single, but I couldn't resist a plug for eHarmony. The site is hosting a free weekend in honor of Valentine's Day, and this special is going to run from Friday (today) to Monday. If you're looking for Mr. (or Miss) Right and you've never tried it, just make a quick visit and look around -- read some of the stories!

Not only did it work for me and my Marty, but also Marty's best friend Preston and his new wife, Misty. eHarmony matched them in the fall, and they eloped on New Year's Eve -- how romantic!

I love you Marty, my forever Valentine!

Happiness

Happiness is, in no particular order,

1. Getting to hear our baby's heartbeat for the first time yesterday. We've seen the heart beating on ultrasound 3 times now, but no audio. During our visit yesterday, the doctor whipped out the regular ole doppler and found Baby's heart beating right away. She tried to stimulate the baby to move a bit but my child refused to budge. I couldn't help but laugh -- this little person is so much like his mother. When we're napping, please leave us alone! But what a reassuring, sweet musical sound: whoosh-whoosh-whoosh. It almost sounded to me like the steady beat of a dog panting! I'm just weird, probably. Biggest news of all: we're tentatively scheduled for the big gender-discovery ultrasound on President's Day, February 16th! We specifically asked for that day because Marty, as a government employee, gets that day off (don't get me started on all the government holidays, so jealous!). Therefore, I'm going to post a poll -- please vote on whether you think it's a boy or a girl!
2. The fact that this little girl went home from the hospital yesterday. Just about 3 weeks ago, I asked everyone to join me in praying for Harper and her family. At that point it was unclear if she would survive. Today this darling little girl is at home, sleeping in her own crib, healed from pneumonia. God is good. He is so very good. I feel privileged to have joined with hundreds of others praying for this very outcome!
3. Getting to sleep here last night:Yes, our mattresses finally came (after a snow delay, curses on you snow!) and we finally moved into the bedroom where our bed frame has been sitting, quite lonely, for several months. Excuse the wrinkly appearance of the duvet, I should have steamed it but oh that's right, I'm fresh out of steamers (and there's no way I'm ironing a king-size duvet). I used to work in an upscale department store and I got addicted to those upright, hand-held steamers. It's now going on the "to buy" list!
4. Reading this book:Yes, you heard me right. Judge me all you want, this book was ridiculously good. I enjoyed nearly everything about it. I jumped on the Twilight wagon quite late (nope, didn't see the movie), but I'm now a huge fan. I would never have thought I'd be interested in a vampire love story, but that's how engaging this book really is. I'm jealous of the author, her writing is so seemingly effortless! Marty and I have a Barnes and Noble date tonight to pick up the sequel, and maybe the next one, too! Did I mention I just bought this book on Monday? Couldn't put it down!
5. The fact that it's Friday. I love weekends with my hubby. We're going to see our dear friends Mike and Jen and their babies on Saturday night, and I love hanging out with them. Other than that, it will be a quiet weekend of bliss inside our marital bubble! Have a fabulous weekend everyone (and stop by your local bookstore to pick up Twilight!).

New Year's news and already dying for Spring

Doesn't this picture give you a lovely zen feeling?

Happy New Year, everyone! I hope all my friends are recovering from the holidays in good order. I'm not...yet. I intend to amend that, but right now there's still a Christmas tree up in my living room (I have a good excuse, we didn't get home from our 2 weeks away until Sunday night!), piles of laundry to do, and gifts to unpack and put away. Not to mention the empty fridge and pantry that keep mocking me... Fortunately, I got all the bills paid yesterday and I'm caught up with work, so I'm not completely slacking.

Tomorrow is my 32nd birthday and Peanut and I have a doctor's appointment. I'm not sure if we're having an ultrasound but I'm prepared to needle, wheedle, and beg for one! If all else fails, I'm playing the birthday card. It's just that at nearly 14 weeks, I know we'll be able to see much more baby this time, if we're allowed. A little birdie told me what my husband is giving me for my birthday, and I'm really pumped about it! We'll close out the day by going to my favorite Italian restaurant here in JC, called Alta Cucina. They have this amazing tomato bisque, and their pasta sauces are incredible. I can't wait!

I've always liked the fact that my birthday so closely follows the advent of a new year. It really helps in reflecting on the year gone by and planning for the year ahead. In addition to planning for a baby in July, we're also planning...dum-dum-de-dum!...a move to Indiana!!! As soon as we found out the baby was on the way, the wheels started turning in Marty's mind (unbeknownst to me at first) about the best place where we could raise our children. Because Marty's parents are both deceased, the only grandparents our children will know will be my parents. Throw in a heaping helping of close-by aunts and uncles and cousins for our children, and Indiana becomes very tempting. Once Marty told me his thoughts, I was overjoyed, to be quite honest. I have not been very happy in east Tennessee. Marty is the light of my life, but being alone all day, never seeing my family, and never even getting out with a friend for lunch or a pedicure (and I've looked for friends here, believe me), puts too much pressure on him as my sole companion and comfort. It's a testament to him that he's done such a good job keeping me fairly content! So, while we were in town over the holidays, we went apartment shopping and already signed up for an apartment we'll probably get in May (there's a waiting list). Since I work from home and could quite literally work from a beach in Bora Bora (if only), the one remaining task at hand is to find Marty a good job. He's starting to put out the feelers, but if anyone in Indiana has a good job lead for an attorney with a decade of experience in labor law, workers' compensation, etc., please do let us know! We would LOVE to be settled and comfy-cozy in our apartment in Indy before the baby arrives, so that's the plan. I have to admit, I'm geeked-out excited about it! The apartment complex does painting for you (for a fee, of course); all you do is hand over a few buckets of paint and voila! Also, after the hassle and chaos of our last move, we decided we're going to pay movers. There's no way I can help while great with child, and I don't want to have my parents help us, and I don't want the burden on my husband, either. It's definitely an expense, but I think a worthy one. So, my big project for the coming months is to purge, purge, purge our belongings and mentally decorate our new home, so I can walk right in and get settled.

Spring has always been my favorite season, but as you can tell, I have a lot of new reasons to look forward to the warmer months. I'll be moving HOME, my baby will be coming soon, and I'll get to have that lunch and pedicure with a friend when I need it (are you reading this Ellen?). So, come soon Spring!

What's been keeping me from blogging?

Just a little something...

The picture is upside-down because my bebe is upside-down inside me right now (click on it for a better view; you can see eyes, arms, and even the umbilical cord near the bottom)! Yes, we are greatly anticipating the arrival of our little one in early July. I'm 9 weeks right now, and even though all the books tell you to wait for the 12th week to make your announcement, it seems bizarre to not publicly acknowledge your child, no matter how tiny it is! I have been GREATLY blessed in my OB/GYN here in Johnson City, especially after having had such a great doctor in Indiana (I didn't think I'd be so fortunate twice!). Dr. Hinton is kind, funny, clever, jovial, warm, and sweet. Seriously, he's all of the above. He listens to my concerns and actually acts on them when necessary. We've had two ultrasounds already as a result; the first one at 6 weeks showed such a wee little thing but it already had that lovely beating heart! Our second ultrasound was just a few days ago, and it showed a much bigger baby than before (I can't believe how fast they grow in these early weeks) with a strong heartbeat (176 bpm). The baby even moved a little during the ultrasound, which surprised us all, even the good doctor! Apparently they don't move a whole lot during this time but it was such a blessing to this mama's heart to see her little one dance around in that warm pool of water!

Pregnancy so far has been something of a challenge for me. Nothing seems to prepare you for the physical and emotional onslaught. I've been a textbook pregnant woman, feeling very sick to my stomach at random times throughout the day, gagging at food smells (I plug my nose when opening the refrigerator; there's nothing smelly in there but I can SMELL things!), craving good things (cherry tomatoes) and bad things (Chips Ahoy!), weeping over anything and everything. Not to mention the fatigue! I have felt so useless at times, watching my hubby do all the meal preparation and clean-up. I just sit in a heap on the couch, moaning with sickness! But what a sweet husband I have. He keeps telling me, Honey, you're doing the REAL hard work, I don't mind doing the little stuff!

In fact, it always feels naughty to complain, even the littlest bit. You see, this baby is a miracle in many ways. We feel blessed beyond measure. The first time we saw the baby's heart beating on the ultrasound, Marty and I locked eyes and the wonder, awe, and joy we felt was and is indescribable. What a gift to have finally found my true place in life, with an amazing man, who I adore, and our child on the way, who I love so dearly. Thanks be to God for his unspeakable gifts!